The “Hotel Stories” abound in problems caused by men. Ms N, the hero of the stories, solves many of them in ingenious and entertaining ways.
Each year, I write a new “Hotel Story” in which hotel manager extraordinaire Ms N solves an impossible problem. Usually, although not quite always, these are problems caused by men. This is because problems caused by men are very common in hotels.
Some people might say that problems caused by men are very common outside hotels, too.
Problems caused by men: The Latest Thing
The Latest Thing was my 12th Hotel Story, published in 2022.
In The Latest Thing, the mostly male management at the Houston HQ of Ms N’s hotel chain send the “Project Thunderbolt” team of mostly male managers to teach her how to run her hotel better. Their first idea is to introduce “Deep Meaning” meditation and yoga sessions with the guru Gandhi Duy-Nam. At first, “Deep Meaning” seems a runaway success, attracting new women customers to the hotel. But Ms N sees something fishy going on…
The Hotel Stories: a disclaimer
I should perhaps underline that the extraordinary events and problems caused by men in the Hotel Stories are not based in any way on reality.
On the other hand, many of the problems caused by men in the Hotel Stories are inspired by tales I have been told by hoteliers. Examples include the customer producing a dead rabbit from their pocket in The Swedish Woman; how fine wine and foie gras are used to win a contract in Chateau d’Yquem; and the morality policy introduced by Mr Smith himself in Mr Smith Sees Red.
Problems caused by men: inspiration
Other inspirations come from my own experience. Francois, the sleazy diving instructor in Sausages, was based on a gentleman running a scuba course I attended in Fuertaventura. I think Francois gets what he deserves. Some readers have told me his fate is too harsh – what do you think?
The behaviour of Francois seems to me a prime example of problems caused by men. It’s hard to imagine a woman behaving as Francois does.
The hole in the ground where the secret police headquarters used to be in The White Blouse resembles a building site next to a hotel I visited in Central Asia.
As for the idea of importing young, vivacious animateurs to liven up a sleepy beach resort, as in Sausages – I’ve seen it happen at Club Med and elsewhere.
How to read the Hotel Stories
The advent of Mr Smith sees Red is a good time to review how to read the Hotel Stories; and the order they come in.
With twelve or more Hotel Stories in circulation, you may welcome a bit of a steer.
The first seven Hotel Stories I wrote are gathered in Seven Hotel Stories, available as an e-book or a paperback. Since then several more have appeared as individual e-books including Sausages and Total Control. The Latest Thing was the fifth of these “orphan” stories – not yet available in a collection or as a paperback.
If and when I complete fourteen Hotel Stories, I hope to produce a second collection in paperback. Perhaps by then the Hotel Stories will have appeared on Netflix.
How to read the Hotel Stories: chronology
I do not write Hotel Stories in date order. Ms N and Tatiana are too unpredictable for that. A story may pop up that belongs early or later on in the series.
But a rough chronological list might run like this:
1. Britches: how Ms N and Tatiana first met. Tatiana has been in the hotel only a few weeks; Ms N is the newly-arrived Director of Rooms.
2. The Two Rooms: Ms N, recently appointed Deputy General Manager, must deal with an obnoxious guest and a hypocritical politician. The Two Rooms was actually the first Hotel Story I wrote.
3. The Swedish Woman: Ms N is now acting General Manager, or GM, as she seeks to solve the mysterious murder of her boss in a hotel elevator before the notoriously corrupt police arrive.
4. Mr Smith Sees Red: Ms N has recently taken over as GM of her hotel. But she faces challenges from her new deputy, who is related to high-ups in the chain’s Houston HQ.
5. The White Blouse: Ms N, accompanied by Tatiana, has been temporarily sent to the country of C– to fix some awful problems at a hotel there (this story is not suitable for children). The White Blouse introduces Susan the Engineering Manager.
6. Total Control: on her return from C– to resume her duties at her old hotel, Ms N faces challenges from the owner, Mr Dolgov, and from Mr Kevin Coatts, a hotel consultant.
7. Sausages: the chain has sent Ms N to a resort hotel to sort it out for the Prince, the interfering owner who cannot understand why his the hotel is underperforming.
8. Chateau d’Yquem: Ms N is working as GM in the original hotel, alongside Tatiana. The COVID pandemic means the hotel must close; Ms N sets out to do good, deploying a bottle of excellent wine.
9. The Latest Thing: the Houston-based hotel chain for which Ms N worked has sent a “Project Thunderbolt” team to tell her how to run her hotel better. Ms N has doubts – particularly about their first suggestion, the “Deep Meaning” lessons of Mr Gandhi Duy-Nam.
10. Gents: Tatiana and Ms N attend a conference in Florida. Ms N wants to become GM of the Ultra Platinum-branded super deluxe London Heart of Mayfair Experience. So does her enemy, the chauvinist Mr Buddy Knox.
11. The Mystery Shopper: Tatiana has become GM at the remote but sumptuous Caravanserai Ultra Platinum. But everything keeps going wrong. Ms N flies in from London to help her.
12. The Three Heads: again, Ms N must come to the Caravanserai Ultra Platinum to help Tatiana with problems caused by a visiting social media sensation and Tatiana’s no-good boyfriend.
Problems caused by men: Who is Harry Lime?
Did I say I wrote only one Hotel Story per year? An exception is Who is Harry Lime? Evil and charisma in “The Third Man”. An Austrian magazine commissioned the story, in which Ms N and Tatiana explore Viennese sites connected with the film The Third Man.
Harry Lime is perhaps one of the most evil men in cinema. On the other hand Anna, the heroine of the movie, falls in love with him. Her love is not even shaken when he betrays her, then dies.
Harry Lime may be the ultimate example of problems caused by men.
Although it features two famous Viennese hotels, it is not really a Hotel Story. You can read the whole text at the link above.
Problems caused by men: read “Seven Hotel Stories”
The best introduction to how Ms N and Tatiana solve problems caused by men is the collection “Seven Hotel Stories“. Click on the link below to buy it as an e-book or a paperback, wherever you are.
